Somebody has been folding 2-by-3-inch slips of paper into sealed packages of Fortunate Charms, Lindt chocolate, Milk Duds, Tylenol, and Velveeta Skillets, and tying them in plastic luggage to bushes alongside Pennsylvania mountaineering trails. Every slip carries 19 strains of densely printed textual content, typically with one nook shouting a single phrase like LIES in capitals. No person is aware of who’s making them.
The slips are known as the Schuylkill notes, after the agricultural Pennsylvania county the place lots of them present up. In accordance with a Wikipedia entry cataloging the continuing thriller, the earliest social media reviews date to 2019, with doable sightings relationship again to 2015. No less than 139 separate finds had been logged by February 2024, plotted on a crowdsourced Google Map stored up by the r/schuylkillnotes Reddit neighborhood.
The textual content itself reads like somebody tried to suit a whole conspiracy podcast onto a enterprise card. One slip will hyperlink Disney, the Pope, the Dalai Lama, the European Union, Pfizer, BMW, Folgers, and Domino’s to secret societies. One other will pull in Vladimir Putin, JFK, the British royals, “Dragon Kings” reptilians, and Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings. The model checklist alone runs to dozens of names: Aquafina, Sunoco, Subaru, AstraZeneca, Pillsbury, Mazda, NescafĂ©.
Slips have been pulled from Walmart, Goal, Wegmans, Dealer Joe’s, Aldi, CVS, Kohl’s, Cabela’s, Lowe’s, and Goodwill. Getting tiny printed leaflets inside factory-sealed cereal and chocolate bars means both a really affected person saboteur on a packaging line or somebody resealing containers nicely sufficient to idiot the patron.
A December 2023 phase by Wilkes-Barre’s 28/22 Information triggered an FDA investigation, since slipping something right into a sealed meals package deal is a federal crime. Congressmen Dan Meuser and Matt Cartwright weighed in publicly. Six years and 139 notes later, no person has been recognized.

By artificialavocado – Personal work, CC BY 3.0, Hyperlink
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